Still here, dearly Beloved

One year ago, me and mine lives took a turn
It was a huge turn
It was an unexpected turn
In the days that followed my physical body bore the blunt of it
My body was disintegrating before my eyes
When my body dragged itself up
My mind took over the spiraling

If you had told me then that I would be here now
I would not have believed you
It was dark, still is in some ways
It was bleak

Then the betrayals came
Fast and furious they did
So painful, so so painful

Closely followed by the overlapping losses
Loss of what I thought was true
Loss of those I called family
Loss of those I called friends
Loss of work
Loss of opportunities
Loss of dignity
Loss of mine
Loss of who I thought I was

Same time love abounded
Love and care
Love and provision
Love and embrace
Love and bearing of burdens
Love that held me and still holds me and mine down

I should not be here, but I am
Mine should not be here, but they are
I am still here
Mine are still here
As a testament to love
As a testament to love

I am dearly Beloved
Mine are dearly Beloved
I know that with every fiber of my being
We have experienced love, in ways I never knew possible
We have been surrounded by love, from far and wide
We have been upheld by love, held down by love
We have been provided for by love, beyond our wildest imaginations
And I am forever grateful!

Grateful for the God who clothes Himself in darkness
He came into my darkness
He came into our darkness
And He stayed
He has stayed with us
He has and continues to unveil Himself to me and mine
He has unveiled me and mine in this space
This liminal space
I am so glad that God exists in darkness
All the while overwhelming us in love
Doing and undoing us in love

We are Dearly Beloved
That is who I am, dearly Beloved
That is who mine are, dearly Beloved
That is the only way I am still here
That is the only way mine are still here

#Beloved 💚🌻💚


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