Liminal Space

his funeral over the weekend . . .

those who spoke

the songs

his daughter’s song

in recent days memories of a friend who committed suicide a year ago have been with me . . .

when i think about DMX

as i try to work through why i am so shaken

as i remember my friend

one lingering thought in my mind is the liminal space

the liminal time

i am thinking about the tension

about the ambiguousness of this space/time

how so many fall through during this time

in my mother tongue this space is best described as:

you are not in the meat, neither are you on the skin

you are nowhere

in no man’s land

unnamed zone

mostly alone

mostly misunderstood

mostly confused

i also have in mind the Nazarene

the one hang on a wooden cross

the one who held the tension of the liminal space

the one between “if you were . . .” and “i know that you are . . .”

i think about Mary

Mary the mother of the Nazarene

i think about the tension she held since the angel showed up

tension she may never have really broken through

tension that she most likely battled alone

tension that had her at the foot of a roman cross

tension that had her looking up to her crucified son

the liminal space

the liminal time

such a dangerous place

yet such a life giving space

a place of death

a place of life

a place of palpable tension

a place of bursting out

a space filed with wounded souls

a space filled with dead bodies

a space of great sorrow

a place of great anguish

a place of reckoning

St. John of the Cross

St. Theresa of Avila

Rahab the Harlot

Hagar the Maidservant

Jochebed mother of Moses

Mary Magdalene

Mary the mother of Jesus

my ancestors of path and nurture

be with me at this time

stay with me through the unravelling

Jesus of Nazareth

you who held up the tension of the liminal space

held it to your own death

stay with me

be with me